Briscoe rebounds with Texas win

Autoracing Betting Lines

06/06/2010 - Fort Worth, TX (Sportsbook Betting Lines) - Six days after crashing in the Indianapolis 500, Ryan Briscoe from Team Penske bounced back in the IZOD IndyCar Series with an impressive win in Saturday's Firestone 550k at Texas Motor Speedway.

Briscoe, the pole sitter, led 102 of 228 laps, but had to hold off a hard- charging Danica Patrick in the closing laps. The Aussie finished 1.46 seconds ahead of Patrick for his first victory of the season and the sixth of his IndyCar career. He also gave team owner Roger Penske his fourth win in the last five races at Texas.

Patrick's second-place finish followed her sixth-place run in the Indy 500. Her Andretti Autosport teammate, Marco Andretti, finished third, while Target Chip Ganassi Racing drivers Scott Dixon and Dario Franchitti, the reigning Indy 500 champion, completed the top-five.

Franchitti appeared to be on his way to a second-straight victory after leading 86 laps, but he fell back in the field after a late-race round of pit stops. He took over the points lead after Penske's Will Power finished 14th. Power had led in the championship standings since the start of the season.

Rookie Simona de Silvestro suffered a minor burn on her right hand after she made hard contact with the wall and then her No.78 car caught on fire. Track safety crews quickly assisted in getting her out of the heavily damaged car.

Helio Castroneves, the defending race winner, was involved in a crash with Mario Moraes during the mid-stages and ended up finishing 20th.

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FOOTBALL TRASH TALK

NFL Football Trash Talk

Trash talk has a place in every competitive endeavor (except baseball; those stirrup-wearers are too busy chewing on their sunflower seeds and their supplements to worry about what their opponents are doing).

Fantasy sports is no exception. Any intelligent discussion of the subject would probably start with a thesis statement or a definition of terms. Thankfully, this wont be an intelligent discussion.

Let me just say that I am happy to take a place in this space alongside my talented colleagues, even our commissioner. (You should see how she bleats like a demented paper boy about league fees on our fantasy site).

Trash talking, I would argue, is primarily about amusing your friends, their sheeplike demeanors and sloping foreheads notwithstanding. The best place I have found for football trash talking is at www.SportsAlarm.com.

Beyond the entertainment factor, though, I would recognize that the sophomoric ritual has one advantage, when properly applied. It magnifies your fantasy triumphs and mitigates your fantasy failures by transforming the eventual point total into an afterthought. Winning makes it seem like your opponent really is a truss-owning, lapel-pin-wearing nitwit. And in defeat, trash talk can be the air bag to break the fall from your hyperbolic heights. The plug-necked yahoos on your team, you can say, will be sacking groceries by the end of the season.

The best trash talk, in my view, is layered and nuanced. And it doesnt focus only on your opponents team. It picks apart your opponent. The idea is to create a shock-and-awe-scale blizzard of nonsense, and the goal is to make your opponent drop his hands from his keyboard in exasperation.

What team does your opponent root for? Accuse a Giants fan of having a Joe Namath pillowcase. Wheres your opponent from? Give a look of concern no matter his reply, then say, I'll try to type slower for you next time. Is your opponent into politics? Label everyone a tax-and-spend corporate shill.

Cap all that with a liberal application of irrelevance. For instance, dont just conclude by saying your opponent is a twerp who drafts like my grandmother. Say that your opponent is a sweater-wearing, eyebrow-plucking twerp who drafts his team about as well as Zsa Zsa Gabor gave acceptance speeches at the Oscars. By the time your foe makes sense of that, his starting running back will have had puppies.

But what about you? Hmm? Recall a memorable slam? Have a tried-and-true technique? Know someone who seems impervious to insult? Take a moment and tells us about it. Put together some (fit-for-publication) thoughts. You wont be too busy returning phone messages from your friends, Im sure, to reply.

In addition to the trash talking, the Sports Alarm has a huge gallery of high resolution pictures of beautiful women and models in bikinis. The most popular models are: Lindsay Lohan, Carrie Underwood, Alessandra Ambrosio, and Paris Hilton.